I know that this can be a touchy subject. The first thing that comes to mind is the thought of your now divorced parents, (Who’s battle can now be Goggled by entering your last name twice) sitting at the grand table together to celebrate your special moment. Who actually wants to sit next to those two, not to mention the discomfort for all involved! Does the word “Elope” come to mind? Corporate settings can be just as bad, when you consider the politics and gossip. Believe it or not, you can actually provide an atmosphere where guests can enjoy a company event, rather that it ending up as an extension of just another working day!
Separate those that do not get along!
The largest determining factor with regard to the number of guests to invite, besides the number of friends and relatives you have, will be your budget. Most catering and rental companies will charge you based upon the number of guests that you Guarantee, or the number of tables, chairs, linen and dishes that you will need to rent. Once you determine the number of guests you can invite, you can move forward with making your selections.
The invitation process is a matter of etiquette and personal conviction. There are differences between co-workers and family. It is acceptable to exclude guests based upon how they are related to you. Remember, you do not have to invite the entire world for your event to be a success, and when working on a budget, you will always want to select quality food and decor over quantity. You will need to exercise some diplomacy when making decisions on who you will invite. It is perfectly acceptable to invite individuals to separate smaller events if necessary, although you may want to call them in advance to explain why they have not been invited to the “main event.” A common reason if due to the size of the venue or that your event will be attended by a specific group or close family members.
Consider Your List Carefully
- Never exclude a direct family member due to a disagreement or from spite
- Do not allow others to influence your guest list. If they decide not to come because someone else will be there – It should be their call and responsibility, not yours
- Don’t invite someone as a courtesy, expecting the guest to decline
- Set your budget, and stick to it
- Don’t feel guilty of you can’t invite someone. Mitigate the issue by making separate time for them
- Don’t hang the success of your event on the attendance of a single individual
(I have attended wedding receptions that actually turned into a family reunion)
- Make sure that you provide no less than 30-days between the mailing date and the event date
- Always RSVP an event with a seating, when budgets are involved, or for events that require structure. You will need to know who is coming.
- Don’t get angry if an RSVP guest fails to attend. Things happen in life!
Many individuals in the computer age start by printing out their contact list. Another option is to use index cards or simply cutting out square pieces of paper. You will want to categorize individuals into three classifications. Must Invite, Could Invite and Not-Invited. Most of you will have problems managing the first list, never mind list two and three. Make sure that you have adequate room, in the venue and with your budget for the “Musts,” and then move to the “Could Invites” if there is room. Don’t forget to include spouses, children or others that are part and parcel for your guest.
Don't Forget Your Guest's Guests
After considering all of your options, it all comes down to just a couple of factors before the seating fun begins. First and foremost, you must consider the purpose of your event, and how a defined seating arrangement would contribute to its overall success. There may be times when open seating is preferred, although more often than not, assigned seating will lend itself to an event that follows a greater degree of structure, such as a wedding or business presentation.
Statistics show that 51% of guests prefer assigned seating, and 33% of guests prefer an assigned table, while only 13% would prefer open seating. Some of The advantages of assigned seating include;
- Preventing an unseemly rush for the “good” seats and locations.
- Open seating often takes more time while guests consider all available options.
- Guests tend to place things on chairs and tilt seats forward to hold their place.
- Who wants to be the last person our couple who can’t find an appealing seat
- Slower or elderly guests often get the last seats and can’t see or hear.
- Last minute guests may take priority seats normally reserved for VIP guests.
Take Care of Your Special Guests
Let’s say for this article that you have decided that you will be following a seating plan. You will need to consider some attributes before you begin drawing diagrams and making assignments. This will help us to get started on the best footing, and then proceed from step to step to complete the best possible plan.
- Determine the final number of guests by reviewing RSVP cards
- Decide if you want to assign specific seats or just assign tables
- Identify guest limitations and VIP’s for entry and movement
- Determine if children will be in the room or segregated to their own room or tables
- Attempt to group families or co-workers when possible
- Separate those that do not get along
- Avoid ending up with spares by assembling table groups at the end
- Map your room and maximum counts per table
Make Room for Access
There are many computer programs available to help you design your seating plan, or you can go through a manual process. Many are free or partially free, while you can find many options by conducting an internet search. I have located one that is simple to use and can have a small party organized in under an hour, and larger parties completed very efficiently. You can down-load this software free for 30 or fewer guests or for a small fee for more. It is money well spent!
http://www.perfecttableplan.com/html/download.html
There are various seating and directional materials that you will need so that guests will be able to find their bearings and navigate the room. These will include;
- Seating Charts – A physical diagram of the room and eating assignments – They are usually posted at the reception area or held by ushers
(These can also be in list form sorted by table or alphabetically)
- Escort Cards – Cards located in the receiving area and provide direction
(Typically sorted alphabetically to tell the guest their table number)
- Table Numbers – These are placed on the table for identification purposes
- Place Cards – Are placed at specific seats
Escort Cards
- Table NumbersThere are many options to help produce, organize and accessorize your materials. They can be produced on software, any computer, hand designed or many other fun ways. You can also get free assistance with your invitations, seating plans and any other aspect -regarding your event, by visiting www.AdrienIsaak.com or by calling 619-501-4522
